Social Media Influencer

How to Be Consistently Inconsistent and Succeed Anyways

June 20, 2023 Jenny Peterson Season 3 Episode 137
Social Media Influencer
How to Be Consistently Inconsistent and Succeed Anyways
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Have you ever wondered if there's a deeper reason behind your inconsistency in entrepreneurship? I was just as shocked to discover that my ADHD could be the underlying cause of this struggle. Join me as I share my journey of researching ADHD, how it affects the brain, and the realization that inconsistency is a hallmark trait of ADHD. Together, we'll learn to embrace our "consistently inconsistent" nature and find ways to work with it, not against it.

Let's talk about the power of persistence and how this can be our saving grace despite the struggles of inconsistency. I’ll share personal experiences from my own life demonstrating the incredible strength of persistence in overcoming ADHD challenges. Get inspired by quotes from great minds like Octavia Butler, Henry Wadesworth Longfellow, and Albert Einstein on the importance of perseverance.

Finally, we'll explore strategies to show up persistently in our lives, focusing on persistence over perfection. I'll discuss how self-shaming for inconsistency leads to procrastination and avoidance, and how quitting is the true enemy of success. Together, let's accept our capabilities and remember that persistence is the key to unlocking our full potential, even if we're consistently inconsistent.

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the social media influencer podcast. I'm Jenny Peterson, a stay at home mom of three turned six figure, social media influencer turned CEO of my own seven figure product based business. I'm obsessed with all things online business, online marketing, influencer marketing, affiliate marketing and social selling. Why am I spilling all my secrets? Because I believe when we all do better, we all do better. Let's dive in. My 10 year old son came up to me yesterday and he said mom, i don't know what HD is, but my doctor said I have 80 of them. I laughed so hard. I was like son, do you even know what that means? He's like yeah, it means ADHD. And I was like do you know that your daddy and I both have ADHD? And he said yeah, do you think I have it? And I said I don't know, but the chances are high for you that we have passed on our awesomeness and attractiveness. Now, before we begin, i will say I am not a licensed professional. I am not a doctor. I am just going to be sharing with my personal experience living with ADHD. When you're listening to this, you think that you might have ADHD or know somebody who has ADHD. Always consult with your doctor, physician or licensed professional. Okay, okay, here we go. So full transparency and all honesty.

Speaker 1:

This episode was supposed to be about how to stay consistent, what to do when you have not been consistent. That's what I have been researching in preparation for this episode, but in doing that, i discovered something that blew my mind. Earlier this week, I've been listening to podcasts all about how to be consistent, and I came across an episode titled How to Be Consistent From a podcast I had never heard of before. It's the I Have ADHD podcast, and that really grabbed my attention because I have ADHD. As I tuned in, i was shocked by what was shared inside this episode, because I never put two and two together. I never put together that.

Speaker 1:

The fact that I struggle with consistency might just have something to do with my ADHD brain And the reason why I've been researching this topic and listening to things about being consistent What I do when you've fallen off the bandwagon is because I've personally been struggling with consistency, not in all areas of my life, but I have really dropped the ball on my Instagram account, which I have never struggled with consistency over there before, and the scary thing is I didn't even notice. I literally just checked right now The last time I posted a reel was April 19th. I mean, it's been almost two months since I have made an Instagram post. I'm super consistent in my stories, but my actual feed posts and I'm like are you kidding me? How did this happen? How did this happen? I didn't even realize it was happening And I've been wanting to get consistent on my Instagram again.

Speaker 1:

So I'm listening to this episode all about how to be consistent from Kristin Carter, who is the host of the I Have ADHD podcast, and she was sharing a book that she had read that was written by Dr Ned Howell, delivered from distractions, and she said Dr Ned Howell endearingly labeled adults with ADHD as being consistently inconsistent. And I was like what Wait, hold up, hold up. Adults with ADHD are consistently inconsistent. I had no idea. Now I have had ADHD my entire life, but I did not get diagnosed until I was in my 30s. So I didn't get diagnosed until I was an adult and later on in life, and I'm just now still continuing to learn about my brain, and I will tell you what. When I did get that diagnosis, though, it just made so much sense. It just I was able to look back and be like, oh my gosh, that's why I do the things I do. That's the way why I think the way I do. I'm not crazy. Like it was almost this relief And I have really enjoyed learning about my brain. So this revolutionary idea that, oh my gosh, i had no idea that maybe, just maybe, the reason why I'm consistently inconsistent is because of my ADHD, i went down the rabbit hole. I have been researching ADHD the rest of the week and couldn't even sleep. Last night I was up till 2.30 am, still researching, hyper-focusing on ADHD and how it affects the brain.

Speaker 1:

Inconsistency is a hallmark trait of ADHD, and I found this quote and I forgot to write down who said it, but it says inconsistent performance. Despite great effort. People with ADHD do great one hour and lousy the next, or great one day and lousy the next, regardless of effort and time and preparation. They go from the penthouse to the outhouse and no time at all. And this is so me. This is so me.

Speaker 1:

Some days I wake up, i wanna conquer the world, i can get hyper-focused, i can be super productive, i can lose track of time And I am like kicking butt and taking names. And then some days it is a struggle to get out of bed. It is a struggle to put on real pants. It is a struggle to put on makeup. It's a struggle to do simple daily tasks And I want to do nothing. And I hate this about myself. I beat myself up about this all the time. I'm like what is wrong with me? What is wrong with me? Why do I do this all of the time? Why am I consistently inconsistent? Why can't I just be the same every day? It's like which, jenny, am I gonna get today?

Speaker 1:

I recently listened to a podcast episode from Jenna Kutcher Gold Digger podcast. I will link the episode in the show notes below. The episode was titled Should I Scale Bigger or Shut It Down An inside look at my daily debate. This was the most refreshing podcast episode I've listened to in a while because I related to it on such a deep level, because this is my daily debate too. Some days I wanna scale it bigger. I wanna see how big we can get it, and some days I wanna shut it down and live on a remote island with no internet. And inside this episode, jenna Kutcher expressed the same things that I feel on the daily And it made me feel so at peace that, oh my gosh, i'm not alone.

Speaker 1:

And then what else I realized is she was recently diagnosed with ADHD. I don't know if she did this episode before or after she found out that she had ADHD, but I seriously wanna reach out to her and be like that's an ADHD trait, So you're totally normal. I'm like does she know? How could she know? Could she know She just got diagnosed? I didn't know that was an ADHD trait. I'm just now finding this out And it is a relief. Honestly, i'm not gonna use it as an excuse of oh, that's why I can never be consistent. Because I have ADHD and we struggle with consistency. We are consistently inconsistent. That's not what I'm saying. I'm not saying I'm gonna use this as an excuse, but knowing that about my brain makes it so that now I can take action and find hacks and find ways to get myself to be more consistent and realize, okay, i am fighting this battle, this internal battle within myself, but this is normal for an ADHD brain.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so back to the podcast episode from the I Have ADHD podcast with Kristen Carter How to Be Consistent. So here she is explaining that if you are an adult with ADHD, you're gonna struggle with being consistent, and she said. It's important to know this about yourself. Inconsistency is a hallmark trait of ADHD. So stop striving to be consistent and stick with me I know this sounds like what She said instead of striving to be consistent.

Speaker 1:

Another hallmark trait of ADHD is persistence. Don't strive for consistency, strive for persistency. The definition of persistent is continuing firmly or obstinately in a course of action in spite of difficulty or opposition. What does it mean to be a persistent person? According to thebritannicacom, it's continuing to do something or to try to do something, even though it's difficult or other people want you to stop. So I don't know if you can relate to this or not.

Speaker 1:

But yes, i struggle with consistency. I struggle with being consistent. But one thing I am very proud about myself is I am persistent as hell. And not only this. I see it in my children, who I am like okay, both your parents have ADHD. I see it in my kids. I am like 99% sure they all have it as well. My middle child. I told her I'm like oh my gosh, you're so persistent. I hope one day you use that persistency, that resiliency, for good. I just take comfort in that, and I hope you do too, because if you're like me and you're like okay, consistency, yes, i'm on the struggle bus with that, but persistent back up I can be persistent all day, every day, let's go. And I think one of the reasons why this was such an aha for me is because for most of my life I have bought into the narrative that the key to success is being consistent.

Speaker 1:

We are told all of these motivational things And I'm going to read some of them to you. This one is from Dwayne the Rock Johnson. Oh my gosh, i just ran upstairs. Now I'm out of breath. This is what it really is like recording from home And the neighbor comes over and the dogs start barking And at summertime and the kids are home and now I sound like a fool. I'm just going to leave this in here. So Dwayne the Rock Johnson said success isn't always about greatness, it's about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.

Speaker 1:

Robert Collier said success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out. Have you heard some of these before? I know I have. Byron Pulsifer said consistency is one of the big things, the biggest factors to accomplishment and success. Zach Frazier said the key to success is consistency And right now, the only way for you to actually take action is to believe in yourself. No wonder we put such an emphasis on being consistent.

Speaker 1:

And, yes, i do believe that taking consistent action is so important. But when you find out that your brain is wired differently and that consistency is actually a hallmark trait of ADHD, it made me question well, can I be successful at all? But I love what Kristin said in her podcast of instead of focusing on being consistent, because you're basically setting up yourself for failure, you're not going to be perfect at it Focus on showing up and being persistent, and I was like I know I can be persistent. So here are a couple quotes that I found about being persistent that I'm going to be using to helping me in those times when I am struggling with consistency and those times where I'm seeking for motivation. This first quote is from Octavia Butler And she said first forget inspiration. Habit is more dependable. Habit will sustain you whether you're inspired or not. Habit will help you finish and polish your stories. Inspiration won't. Habit is persistence in practice. Oh, i love that, isn't that good?

Speaker 1:

Henry Wadesworth, long fellow, said perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. Albert Einstein said it's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer. Isn't that exactly what being persistent is? If we go back to the definition of persistence, persistence is the firm or obstinate continuance In a course of action in spite of difficulty or opposition. That's exactly what Albert Einstein said. He stayed with his problems longer. He was crazy persistent.

Speaker 1:

This really challenged my beliefs, honestly, because here I thought, the secret to success, the key to success, is being consistent. Well, crap, i struggle with being consistent. So am I ever going to be able to be successful? So many successful people have ADHD And one of the things that we can rely on is we are persistent. So I am going to continue to show up, be persistent as I'll get out. Continue to show up even if it's inconsistently, and grow my business. Show up from my dang self when most people would quit. Another quote I stumbled upon in researching this particular topic. I mean, i went down the rabbit hole.

Speaker 1:

Moira Maven said with ADHD, one thing we can consistently count on is inconsistency. That doesn't have to be a bad thing. Two steps forward and one step back is still forward. It does take us in the direction we want to go. Do you ever feel like you're taking two steps forward and one step back? Two steps forward, one step back. Is it just me? Is it just me that has their hand in the air right now? And a lot of times it's self-savotage. A lot of times it's because I'm getting in my own way. A lot of times it's because I'm showing up inconsistently that I'm doing this two steps forward, one step back. Two steps forward, one step back, but forward is forward, forward is forward. And if you keep showing up, you're persistent and you don't quit And you keep showing up, forward is forward And you're eventually going to get to your goals And you can achieve success.

Speaker 1:

Even if you were an adult with ADHD Friend, i would love to do some more episodes all about ADHD. If that's something that you're interested in, please come over on Instagram, slide into my DMs and let me know. You can find me at Jenny underscore Peterson. And if you're like me and you have been consistently inconsistent, give yourself some grace, especially if you have ADHD. I didn't realize there was a connection there. I didn't realize that there was a link there, and when I found out that it's a hallmark trait of ADHD being consistently inconsistent. My first thought was oh my gosh, well crap, how can I be successful? because consistency is the key to success. But I am choosing to focus on one of my ADHD superpowers, which is being persistent. And if you struggle with consistency, too, i challenge you to focus on showing up persistently, being crazy persistent, showing up on the days when you don't feel like it, showing up when most people would have already quit.

Speaker 1:

And what are we gonna do when we realize that we've messed up, like I did with my Instagram account, and realize, oh my gosh, i don't know what happened, i didn't even realize this was happening, but it's been almost two months since I've posted. What are we gonna do? We're gonna take one small action today to move forward in the right direction, because forward is forward. We're gonna give ourselves some grace, we're gonna be kind to ourselves And we're gonna do one small thing today, because I don't know if you're like me, but I have realized that I've been inconsistent for a while and I keep telling myself well, i'll do it tomorrow. What's one more day? No, i'm gonna post today.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to post something today on my Instagram because I realize I've been inconsistent and instead of saying, oh, it's too late, i've screwed it up, i've probably lost all these followers. What does it matter? if I post today, i might as well start next Monday. I'm gonna post today, i'm going to forgive myself for being inconsistent, and then I'm going to be persistent and continue to show up persistently on my Instagram account and in all aspects of my life, because I know that is a superpower that I have is being persistent, because you know What's not gonna help me get to my goals and my dreams is being stuck in my own head, procrastinating, overthinking, feeling guilt and shame. No, so if you're like me and you realize, oh my gosh, i have been consistently inconsistent, do one small thing today, one small thing today that when you go to bed tonight, you will be so happy that you did do one small thing today that your future self will thank you for.

Speaker 1:

Here's something I wrote down as I was researching this whole thing When we think we're supposed to be consistent, we shame ourselves for being inconsistent. And the truth is we are going to be inconsistent because we are human. If we're not perfect Especially if you have ADHD you're going to be inconsistent. So what happens is, if we're inconsistent, we shame ourselves for that. That leads to procrastination and avoidance. And if we are stuck in, procrastination and avoidance will continue to be inconsistent until we just Quit.

Speaker 1:

And I'll echo something that Kristin Carter mentioned in her episode that inconsistency, showing up, consistently inconsistent, that's not the enemy of success. The enemy of success is quitting. And when you are persistent, you refuse to quit. It's that refusing to quit attitude, it's that persistency, that showing up, even when it's hard, especially when it's hard, especially when most people would have said you know what I'm quitting, it's being persistent which is going to lead to success and that just gives me so much comfort. I'm not screwed. We're not screwed, friend, we're not screwed. That is my message for you today. Friend, i hope you know how special you are. I hope you know how beautiful you are inside and out. I hope you know that you have greatness inside of you and you can do anything you put your mind to do, even if you are showing up consistently inconsistent. Be persistent, my friend. You can do this. I love you and I will see you inside the next episode. You.

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